I’m finding myself not saying no enough. With that said, the things I am saying yes to are challenging me to be a better person. A better coach. A better advocate. They are helping me help others. Many others. So many others.
I am humbled to be able to give back to those that need so much support right now. How do I say no to that?
How do I say yes along with making sure I am not over stretching. Over reaching. Over whelming.
How do I continue to help so many without hindering the ability to ensure I am continuing to help myself.
We as coaches teach others to have tools and learn techniques to ensure they keep their boundaries and are doing the best for them as it is the only way to do the best for others.
What tools do you have in your toolbox to ensure you can still be of service to others while also ensuring you are of service to yourself?
I’m learning meditation. I think I’m finally getting the hang of it. I find it balances me for the task(s)/day ahead.
I’m journaling. I journal about what I’m grateful for and I write down those that I appreciate. I write lists. I write pros and cons. I write blogs!
I’m connecting. I’m connecting with my inner moxie and self to ensure I stay aware of situations that may be uncomfortable or challenging. I’m connecting with others. I’m connecting back to my exercise routine. I’m connecting on levels I didn’t know existed.
I’m networking. I am ensuring I am building a strong network of like-minded individuals that I know will have my back as they know I have theirs.
I am resting. At least trying to... I must take time to switch off the screens, the phone, the brain. This one is probably the hardest for me.
I am eating nourishing foods to keep me healthy and focused.
I read. I am an insatiable reader and there are times I can get through a book in a day. I love to learn. I love to get lost in stories.
So I ask once more, what tools do you have to ensure you can still be of service to others while also ensuring you are of service to yourself?
Ensure you have a toolbox full of techniques you can use to keep your boundaries in place. Say no when saying yes doesn’t feel right. Say yes for the right reasons.
Moxie on my tribe…
I look at this picture and wonder how in the hell I got myself mixed up in an emotionally abusive relationship. This is after my best Boston marathon finish of 3:40:20. An 8:25 pace. A very not easy marathon. I was running sad. I was running angry. I had gotten a call from the man I was dating before the marathon start, saying he was sorry once again (he was supposed to be there with me). That he wished me good luck. That he will be happy when I am back to celebrate. I was sucked right back in...
After running the race, I posted this picture. The first call I got from him was “why would you post that picture? It’s awful. Your nose looks huge. The shadow makes you look so bad.” Not congratulations. Not great job. Not how are you feeling. Even looking at it now, I remember the only reason my hair was growing out was because he liked women with longer hair and not short (like I usually wear it). Ugh.
Three months after this picture started my downward spiral into trading one abuse for another.
Folks. If you are in a relationship that does not feed your inner strength, your inner beauty, your badassery... get the fuck out of it now. If you are only hearing words of defeat, of toxicity, of cruelty, of anger… get the fuck out now.
Do you find this language harsh? I don’t think I’m sorry for that. This was one of the deepest, darkest holes I had been in. And, even after this, I let it continue. I let it continue for three more months. And after that? We didn’t speak for almost a year. But then... with one text, I was sucked back in all over again. On and off for over a year. Until a line was crossed. A line that was harsher than any of the others already crossed. That situation changed my outlook on dating and who I let into my life. It did not stop the other abuse I was doing to myself with alcohol. That took another 10 years, a lot of blacked out nights, lost memories, and a whole lot of self-loathing which eventually turned into self-love. It is no wonder I still have my sanity and my life.
I cannot be the one who fixes it for you. No-one can except for you. But I sure as hell can be here for you to help you find the resources you need. To hold space for you to cry, vent, scream, and find your inner voice to finally stand up for yourself.
Do not let it get to the point of no return. You deserve a happy, fulfilled, joyful, purpose-driven life. People love you with a true, joyful, happy love. These are the people that you need to surround yourself with on a daily basis. An hourly basis. A minute-by-minute basis if that is what it takes.
After this picture, I was fired from a coaching gig with my running partner. He and his wife were two of my best friends (thank God they are still in my life). I had turned into a shell of my former self. Trying to conform into someone I was not. Trying to be the person he kept telling me I needed to be. My parents who had not spoken since 1994 were on the phone with one another trying to figure out how to help me. How to break me free. Friends stopped calling me and hanging out with me because they didn’t know what to do or how to help.
Do not let this happen to you. Reach out to people that can support you. We are here. We want to support you. Help you. Advocate for you. I won’t lie, it will be a long, ugly, terrifying process to go through, but trust me, it is better than what the outcome could ultimately be.
Find that love for yourself just enough to take that first step. We are here waiting to grab your hand to hold you steady and pull you forward.
I read these words at 1:06am. To say the effect of these words had on me was profound is an understatement.
I am still processing through the tears of a pure joyful connection that is happening in my brain and in my soul.
I cannot express the feeling these words have sparked within me. We all have self-talk. Those words of “You’re not deserving of this pure love”. “You’re not good enough for someone to actually feel this way for you.” “How could they feel like this for me when I don’t feel this for me.”
The profoundness that this is evoking within me is not those words above. The profoundness that this is evoking within me is acceptance of these words. The true feeling and emotion from these words. The love from these words.
I am good enough to be what these words say. I am genuinely loved in the way these words have been spoken. I can fully accept these words and say thank you to my cousin for telling me these words. Normally, the first thing I would reply with is thank you and I love you so much and something I love about her too. And every word I would say I would mean it from the heart.
But I would then most likely launch into words such as, “you didn’t need to say that.” Or “you’re crazy, how could you feel that way about me.” Or “it’s just little ol me, but thank you.”
Not this time. This time I get to respond being fully present and free of the self-talk. I get to respond fully from the heart.
Dear cousin, your words have made such a profound imprint on my heart and in my soul. My love for you has always been special and unique. Being only children, we have always had a special bond with one another even when we haven’t spoken in a while. It was always you I couldn’t wait to see at the reunions every year. It was always you I couldn’t wait to see at the mall when we were both old enough to get jobs. It was you who I dragged to the Dominican Republic when my life was turned upside down. It was you that always would pop up with words of encouragement when you didn’t even know I needed to hear them the most at that particular time.
Dear cousin, your words have made me realize I have so much to give to others. To advocate for others. To show love and gratitude for others. Your words have brought a quiet confidence to me to continue to be an inspiration for you. For others. For myself.
Dear cousin, these 31 words mean I am worthy. I am loved. I am a treasured cousin.
Dear cousin, I love you with a fierceness of purpose and joy.
Your Views of Perfectionism and How They Affect Your Life
There’s nothing wrong with wanting things in your life just so, wanting things beautiful, wanting everything done right, and wanting to work hard to achieve great goals. However, there is no such thing as perfect, which is what so many people forget. You can’t have a perfect home or a perfect life or do a perfect job. Mistakes are made, flaws are present, and every day is not perfect. If your perfectionism is severe, it might have a negative effect on your mental health. Do you think your desire to have everything perfect all the time is hindering your ability to live a good life?
I know it did me. I truly think that’s one of the reasons I turned to alcohol. I was so tired of being in control, being the good one, being the perfect this and the perfect that. I used to joke how I knew which number strand of hair was out of place. I wore makeup from the time I was out of the shower until the time I went to bed. See me without makeup in public? I think not!
After I started drinking, I started caring less about being perfect. I cared more about the buzz, having fun, being funny, taking the edge off, and not caring so much about anything else.
Over the next several years, I actually felt free! Free from being perfect. Free from being upset about making mistakes. Free from caring what others thought if I said or did or looked the wrong way. As you can tell, I went from one extreme to the other. And, fast.
There really is a place in the middle that can be healthy with reality and perfectionism. And also reality and drunkism.
I have found that sweet spot! And you already know what I call it… Moxie! It’s that place where you know you’re okay if you’re not perfect and you know that you have the control back in your life being sober. Win, win! And, boy, does it feel good.
It’s also the place where you hold yourself accountable. You learn from your mistakes and your past. You learn that perfectionism is impossible. You learn that drunkism is impossible as well. Both can cause you to lose friends, jobs, relationships, mental health, freedom, creativity, and life itself. One can leave you an empty shell from all the worry, the other, six feet under.
High Standards and Reality
Set high standards for yourself in every area of your life. You don’t want low standards to live by, but you cannot set high standards and expect perfectionism from each of them. There will never be a perfect job or a perfect mate. You will never look perfect or behave perfectly, and nothing will ever perfectly happen. Set high standards, and learn how to re-evaluate them as needed to allow for small imperfections.
Pressure and Perfectionism
Your high standards are not your problem, but it’s your perception of reality that is a problem. If you believe you cannot go through life if things are not just so, done this way, or appear that way, you are putting too much pressure on yourself. For example, if you cannot leave your home without everything being put away and all things looking perfectly clean, you might put a lot of pressure on yourself if you’re already running late when you realize you need to clean up behind your kids.
Now you’re late for work, your kids are late for school, and what did you get out of this? A clean house is what you got, but is that worth the detention your kids must now attend or the reprimand your boss issued when you rushed into the office 10 minutes late for a meeting?
If you put pressure on yourself to achieve perfection, you’re going to get perfection. Unfortunately, you’re going to get perfection in only the area on which you’re focused. The rest of your life is going to fall apart.
Mental Health and Perfectionism
You’ll drive yourself crazy if you want things perfect and don’t allow any room for mistakes. You do want things to be perfect, and there’s nothing wrong with that. You must simply allow yourself to understand that there will be things that prevent perfection. Until you understand that, you might just suffer from depression, anxiety, stress, and even health issues that affect your physical body, your emotional health, and even the relationships you have with the people you love.
It’s not easy to give up the idea that perfection does exist, but you cannot live like this if you want to maintain a happy and well-balanced lifestyle. You cannot live this way if you want to be healthy. It’s time to face your fears and learn what makes you feel this way, fix the problem, and learn to talk yourself out of being perfect all the time.
I’m happy that hair strand 1,443 is out of place. I’m happy that I’m sitting here writing this in my workout clothes because I was too lazy to return to my work clothes for the rest of the day. I’m happy that I can laugh at myself for a silly mistake or a mispronounced word. I am happy that people accept me for who I am and how I present. Whether I’m in my badass corporate suit, or whether I’m in my jeans and a t-shirt.
Have high standards, please! It keeps us on our toes and doing our best. Just keep them in check and don’t let them get the best of you if something is not perfect. Life is full of imperfection. Once you start to love the imperfections, you start to love the whole-self and your heart will be yours. And to you…you will be perfect.
As I sit here at 1AM on the side of the bathtub, wide awake with a thousand thoughts going through my head, my What If’s start happening…
What if I don’t fall back to sleep?
What if I forgot to do something at work?
What if I forgot to turn off my electric blanket under my desk?
What if my clients don’t believe in me?
What if my business fails?
What if my big dreams fail?
I’m thankful that it is those types of what if challenges running through my brain instead of what used to…
What if I said something I don’t remember?
What if I got pulled over driving home?
What if I didn’t remember driving home?
What if I fell and broke something because oh my God that (insert body part here) hurts?
What if I screw up my job because my brain is so foggy?
What if I stop drinking? Will people still like me? Will I still be “funny”?
What if I screw up my marriage?
Nowadays, I’m usually fine by morning but this is what happens most nights these days. I don’t think it’s a bad thing, other than not being able to shut off the ol’ brain. Something I am working on with meditation and calming exercises. Transparently, I probably should cut out some of the caffeine and snacks too close to bed too, but I digress.
Implementing a newer tool to me, I’ve started getting out of bed and writing things down to get them out of my head. Otherwise, I feel a bit defeated in the morning because most times while I’ll remember the idea, I won’t remember all of the fun particulars and details that came about with the excitement of said idea.
This blog is one of those things that now sometimes happen when I sit and write emails to myself at 1:20 in the morning to make sure I get all out.
I know all about “no screens” once you’re in bed. Some have taken it so far as to not even have their screens in the bedroom. Kudos to them! I wouldn’t be able to get these thoughts out if I didn’t though. I definitely don’t want to turn on a light. I’d for certain, be up the rest of the night.
Getting the thoughts out these days is one of the most important tools I have in my toolbox. It just so happens some of the best ideas come in the dark of night. So…
What if I didn’t have my phone next to me to jot down quick notes? I probably would not have remembered so many details. Would that have been a bad thing? Nope. I’m sure something similar would have come pouring out of me in the light of day. Could I turn on a light and put pen to paper? Sure, but then I’d be up the rest of the night.
Do you live in a what if circle? Going round and round about things you have no control over? What do you do to combat that? Do you write out the different scenarios and their possible outcomes? Do you let it fester and drive you a little batty? Do you give it up to a higher power or shove it out into the universe and let it go?
What if’s can be detrimental to you and your mindset.
If you are working on having a better, more positive mindset, the what if conundrum can surely get in its way and possibly derail it all together.
This is why I truly believe having the right tools that work for you in your toolbox (mine is pink, of course), help you work through your what if’s.
Journal. Record. Talk them through with someone you trust. Don’t let them get the best of you. Have you noticed that most of the time the what if’s are far worse than the actual outcome? Be open to the fact that you just may not have control over the situation and trust that whatever the outcome may be is the path you are meant to be on. It may not seem like it at the time, especially if the outcome is the opposite of what you wanted to happen. It most likely will be a challenge to understand at the time. In hindsight we will see why it turned out the way it did. And we will hopefully see some positive circumstances that came of it.
That hindsight may also bring with it, regrets. We all have regrets to some degree. To me they are another form of what if’s. What if I said something different? What if I didn’t drink that night when I said mean things to the kids? What if I would have left the gym earlier, would I have gotten in that accident?
Let’s put a different spin on them. Are you able to look at your regrets in a different way?
What if I said something different? I didn’t, so I sit with what I said, understand where it was coming from, and I apologize to whomever it was that I hurt or offended. I take responsibility for that action.
What if I said mean things to the kids? I have apologized more than one or two times to all three of my bonus kids about my behavior and things that I said. I took ownership. I took accountability. No matter how hard that was for me, it brought them peace of mind to know that it wasn’t them and that I love them no matter what.
What if I left the gym earlier? There could have been another accident that may have happened that wouldn’t have turned out as minor. I could be far worse off than I am now.
Practice on your regrets to help you learn how to get through your what if’s of the future. You can’t change the past. You also can’t change what you can’t control in the future.
What if I don’t get the promotion? What if I didn’t work hard enough for it? What if it wasn’t the right time for me yet? What if there’s something I still need to work on? What if it just wasn’t mine to have?
What if no one reads this blog? What if I don’t fall back to sleep?
What if I just finish this tomorrow because my head is finally calming down and I can fall back to sleep? What if I hate this blog in the morning? (Puts phone away and goes blissfully back to sleep.)
And here I now sit, at 7PM Tuesday evening, finally getting back to this blog. And, I’m reworking a lot of it now that I have the light of day and clarity of mind. What if I don’t do my best work at 1AM…
What are your what ifs? Can you find a tool that works for you to sit with them and understand why they’ve hijacked your mind and your precious time? Are you able to take that tool and work through them, to push through the what if to either let it go or reconcile what happened and learn from it to move on?
My what ifs are so completely different even from three months ago let alone a year ago. They are evolving. And while they are evolving, so is my awareness about them and how I can sit with them and then work through them with clarity and gentleness for myself.
They are my new learning tool. They, too, reside in my toolbox.
“Wow. You’ve totally just unraveled my thinking process with that. What an interesting way to look at that. Now I’m excited to explore that possibility!”
YESSSSSSSSS!! Making things happen to provoke thoughts, realize dreams, and different ways of using the brain.
It occurred to me when my client said this during one of our sessions, that the word “unraveled” isn’t always a negative thing. Things unraveling, or coming apart, can lead to new beginnings, new ways to look at things, new connections coming together.
When something unravels, there are a million smaller particles that make up what was unraveled. When we see these in front of us, all these tiny pieces of what we thought to be true, we can begin to see the pieces that may not necessarily have been working for us, or what we thought was perfectly fine and good – really isn’t.
What happens when we separate these pieces that aren’t serving us? We can exam them and sit with them to understand that while they don’t serve us the way we thought they did, there is still a purpose to them. We can change our thinking and our understanding, and challenge ourselves to use this knowledge and turn it into a greater good for ourselves.
When we take the time and think about those things that don’t serve us the way we thought, and we use them to understand why we thought they did serve us, we can start to build new thinking patterns for our futures. We can now become aware of challenges that inevitably come to us that we automatically think something negative, “I can’t possibly do that,” “that’s too hard, I’ll never be able to complete that,” “what did I do to deserve this negative remark from this person,” “why can’t I not care about what others think of me.” The list can go on and on, right? We all have these automatic negative thoughts that can derail us from our dreams, from our purpose, from our love for ourselves, to what’s at hand right in front of us, whether that’s a relationship or work or a project.
When you can consciously unravel those thoughts and think about them, then you can think about WHY you think that and really start to understand what it is holding us back, fear. Fear of upsetting someone. Fear of someone forgetting who we are. Fear of doing something new and exciting that you may very well fail at, but should do anyway. Fear of hurting someone else. Fear of failed relationships.
Once you unravel and you figure out those tiny pieces and use them to challenge that negative thought process and challenge yourself to use it in a positive way, you CAN possibly do that, you CAN do that hard thing that you’ll be able to complete, YOU can understand the negative remark from that person is something THEY need to deal with, it’s not about you, you CAN absolutely not care what others think of you, you CAN leave a relationship that is not serving the individuals involved. Because… YOU will love you for who you are, and that your opinion of yourself and your abilities are enough. Because YOU have respect for yourself and other individuals involved in the unraveling, knowing that this will build something greater for them as well – IF they choose to do so for themselves.
What do you need to unravel, to examine, learn from, tear down and build back up into something better, more solid, or something entirely new? What dreams can you realize with different thinking patterns? What love can you allow yourself when you realize your opinion of yourself is the most important opinion? What moxie can come out of an unravel….it is limitless. Go start unraveling some things and let me know what you find. It just may be that one of those particles ends up being the diamond that shines bright on a whole new life adventure.
What does that word mean to you? Does it mean you failed? Does it mean you got slammed to the ground and now you can’t find the strength to stand? Or, does it mean a misstep, something temporary that pushed you around a little? Or, does it mean growth, a fire under the butt to prove you can get back up and try again?
I know we all feel defeat at some points in our lives. Some more than others. Some decide that they are not strong enough to get back up and stay in a state of defeat indefinitely. I see others take their defeat and throw it like a shot-put across a football field as far away from them as possible. Then, there are those few souls who take their defeat, look it straight in the eye, and make it feel its own defeat until it collapses and is no more.
I don’t know about you, but I’ve been through all three. I’ve been down and out for long periods of time until I decide enough is enough. I throw defeat as far away from me as possible and “hope” it doesn’t come back. And, I’ve now discovered I can stare defeat down and make it my bitch. Excuse the language, but sometimes a direct, not-so-fluffy response is necessary.
I’m in the midst of staring defeat down right now. I’m pushing hard. I’m learning every avenue I can to challenge the defeat and make it weak. Weak enough that it falls to the ground and melts into the earth. Leaving me with my head held high and a confidence to know how to push through tough times, tough thoughts, and tough situations.
Alcohol was like that for me for a very long time. I tried so hard to throw it as far away from me as I possibly could. I’d stand proud thinking I defeated it, that “this time” would be the time it wouldn’t come crawling back. I can’t tell you how many times I threw it away from me. But the last time, the last time I threw it, I didn’t have the energy to throw it far, and it kept me down for quite a long time. Long enough that my body suffered, my relationships suffered, my job started to suffer. I was suffering. Until I wasn’t.
I stood up one day. I stood up, looked defeat in its sad, ugly face and said no more. I challenged it all day every day. I learned how to defeat it by learning tools for when I felt weak and it was clamoring to climb back up and into my life. I learned how it affected my whole being internally and externally. I became strong, confident, empowered, and…I fell in love with ME. The most powerful gift I gave myself and the most powerful enemy of defeat.
It is true that there are times that we have to accept that we were wrong or beaten by another in some race or some project. That does not mean we are powerless to grow from that defeat and put it in its rightful place. It does not mean what you were trying to accomplish will never happen. It just may look a little (or a lot!) different than you originally planned. That, is not defeat.
I challenge you all to look at what you feel defeated within your life right now. Is it something easy that you can course correct and let it melt into the ground? Or is it something that you have been struggling with for a long time and know you need help and support to become strong again to look your defeat in the face and make it crumble? Are you ready to love yourself again, or maybe for the first time ever?
We all have it in us to conquer our defeat. If you need support or an advocate, let me be the first to say “how can I help?”
I found this quote through one of the apps I am on for coaching, Soar, and they also posted it on Instagram:
“There’s a difference between being the best in the world and being the best for the world.” - Clint Pulver
It keeps drawing me back and wanting to write something about it. As I write this, I’m not even quite sure what it is, but it’ll get there in the end. As a coach, I believe both statements are true, but in a wholly different light than what most people think. I want to be the best for the world so my clients can be their best in the world.
I want my clients to know they CAN be the best in the world. I also want them to know that what they can bring to be the best IN the world will ultimately also be the best FOR the world. I work with my clients to see that sobriety and recovery is the best option for a life well lived. That it is the beginning of their life, not the end of it. Not a life that they have lost. Not a love of a substance they can no longer have. Not the negativity that bears down on them keeping them below their capability of being a badass.
Those that are in recovery and have found sobriety are those that cannot drink or do their drug or habit of choice any longer. They can’t “moderate”. It doesn’t work. They need to find how to navigate self-love, relationships, work, passion, and their life adventure. They need their moxie, not moderation. Just taking that first step to realize that they are first, they are the priority, they need to become the best. The best for them. The best for the world. That, organically, makes them the best in the world.
“Best in the world” doesn’t mean being number one. Being best in the world means showing up every day and doing your best for the world. You take your passion and your purpose and you shout it out to the world. You own that like a badass. You use your moxie to take it to the next level. You use it to help others become the best in the world by being the best for the world.
Even if you don’t have issues with addiction, you MUST find your purpose. You MUST use it to be your best in the world. Don’t lose your chance to be that best in the world for yourself and others, and to be the best for the world. Make a difference. Step up and step out of your comfort zone. Use your moxie.
I know I talk a lot these days about passion and purpose. And moxie. But hey, moxie is how I roll… This does not mean you need to be all happy, glitter, and rainbows every day. I certainly am not. But those days that I am not, I use the things that bring me down, the mistakes I ultimately make, the words I ultimately don’t mean to say, and I turn them into learning experiences. Sometimes they hurt and I cringe and I second/third/fourth guess if I did something that was really wrong or if it’s all in my head. Most times, it’s just in my head blown out of proportion to the nth degree.
Because of those learning nuggets, I am adding to my purpose and my moxie to be the best in the world. To be best for the world because I have learned.
Like me and so many others before them in this stage of discovering that moxie, my clients learn by their past mistakes, traumas, and bad days. They falter and get back up again and again. But, you know what? They are showing up to life. Every.Day. They show up for themselves, they show up for me, they show up for everyone in their life. They show up to be the best in the world to be the best for the world so others can see their shining light. And yes, their moxie.
How about you. Are you the best in the world? Are you being the best for the world? If you are, you are a badass. A ROCK star! If not yet, what are you waiting for?
Did you ever have one of those days where everything just falls into place? I mean, it’s Monday, so somewhere in the back of your head you’re thinking…another Monday…what’s going to happen today.
I receive a message from “The Universe” (if you don’t get your messages every day, make sure you sign up NOW!), every day. The past several weeks, the messages have been really hitting home and have been hitting really deep. Today’s was no different. I posted it to my personal Facebook page and Instagram because I thought it was such a great message:
“A great trick to getting what you want, fast, Dana, though one requiring a deep level of understanding, is 'insistence.'
Not the kind, however, that expects 'life' to behave a certain way, but the kind that expects you to behave in a certain way.
I already knew my Monday was going to start off with a bang from the Universe. One of the biggest influencers of my running and recovery arena reached out to have a chat. Me. ME!!! We spent almost an hour and a half speaking of all things running, recovery, service to others, and big world dreams. It was an amazing ever-flowing conversation that I look forward to continuing.
Something must’ve been in the air from that conversation. A definite zing and MOXIE, because after that the heavens just kept pouring down the glitter. I had one of my favorite coworkers and friend call to catch up. After kibitzing all things work, life, Covid, and such, the conversation led into telling him about my 30,000 foot dream, and how I’m looking for data points and understanding in the corporate world, and voila, he knew a company right off the bat that is doing what I am looking to do.
Then! The Montgomery County Chamber of Commerce calls. I recently joined and they make calls to new members to get introduced and familiar with their business and to ensure the new members are aware of all of the events and programs that are available to us. During the most excellent conversation he began to list all of the events for the year, including an inaugural 5K in July. Guess who’s now on the committee!
But wait! There’s more! In my one on one meeting with my ever so favorite manager, and during an organic conversation about the things I’ve been doing with my coaching business, my recovery, and ideas, my big 30,000 foot dream came up. Because my company rocks and my manager rocks, we are working on a PPP – proposal, presentation, and pitch – to bring my 30,000 foot dream to life. Oh. My. God.
The incredible support, collaboration, and inspiration is nothing short of humbling and me being completely speechless. And, if you know me, that’s pretty darn hard to do.
I can see my dream. I can feel my dream. My insistence of authenticity and raw vulnerability to put my life and story, and my dream out there is being heard. The extremely hard work is on me. Every single second of it is worth it. If I can see this through fruition, the help I can provide to so many will be worth it. My purpose is real.
What is your insistence? What is your 30,000 foot dream that you want to see come true? Are you willing to put it out there? Are you willing to put in the work? Are you ready to be authentic and vulnerable? I am.
Coming up on a significant sober milestone, I’ve been thinking about how I tell folks I don’t drink anymore. The automatic statement is “I quit drinking”. Some of the responses to that have been “Great!”, “Good for You!”, and the quintessential “I’m no quitter!”
That last one does drive some spikes through the skin. Because in my mind, and many of those that have taken on the sobriety journey, it means everything. It means getting something completely negative out of your life, and hopefully for good. It means quitting a toxicity that could potentially kill you. It means quitting a horrible existence. To me, those are all POSITIVE reasons to be a quitter.
I am a proud quitter! I truly am. I have quit smoking. I have quit animal products, I have quit alcohol. But you know what all that did? It made me a CREATOR of my life. One piece at a time. One healing moment at a time.
Instead of quitting smoking, I created a whole new running career for myself. I’ve run over 65 marathons, several of them on multiple days. I’ve run 100 miles in one shot. I’ve had injuries that have taught me patience and awareness of my own body and physical wellness. I’ve met more people that have become part of my tribe and are amazingly good humans.
Instead of quitting animal products, I created a whole new way of eating. Along with that, I’ve been able to save many animals from being on my plate. I’ve saved my arteries from unneeded cholesterol and saturated fat. I have a new appreciation for the earth we inhabit and the sentient beings we share it with. I have healed my body with nutrients I would not otherwise have even given thought to. I have shared my knowledge of plant based eating along with environmental and ethical issues with those who have asked. I’ve met more people that have become part of my tribe and are amazingly good humans.
Instead of quitting alcohol, I created my whole new life’s adventure. I rediscovered my moxie. I have found my true authentic self and my purpose. I am overwhelmed by the pull I feel to help others who have struggled like me. I have saved myself from poisoning my body, mind, and soul any further, and God forbid, causing any harm to myself or others. I have found my clarity and focus for life’s passion once again. I am now giving back to others and helping them on their journey to find their life’s adventure. I’ve met more people that have become part of my tribe and are amazingly good humans.
Notice the theme… creation and my tribe. What are you quitting today to help you create something magnificent tomorrow?